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Saved by Grace's avatar

I'm with John (above) on this....you know what, we're all humans just doing our best. We set ourselves goals, sometimes we meet them and sometimes we don't. I reckon cutting yourself some slack and keeping stress to a minimum has got to be the way to go Mark. Breathe, be gentle with yourself and take care 🙂 Karen

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Mark Stevenson's avatar

Wise words Karen! 🫶

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Old Codger Steve's avatar

As a prostate cancer guy on hormone therapy the hairlessness is taken to the extreme. Yep we are only human ( Rag n bone man song ? ). Hey sod perfection its taking the long view that counts , surely. Wish you well and keep on keeping on, in the main, on the right path . The odd dilly dallying and detour is fine you know.

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Mark Stevenson's avatar

Thank you Old Codger Steve....I am keeping my eyes on the horizon as much as possible!

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John Newton's avatar

My psychologist puts it differently; it’s like you hit a wall with the exercise / food / wellbeing and you just need a reset (in whatever form that takes) and that is fine. You will hit the wall again and you will have another reset, but considering what your body is going through that is understandable. Accept what is going on, realise you will have these episodes, and don’t be hard on yourself! This is our life now.

Take care. John. TDW

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Mark Stevenson's avatar

Thank you John...reset button activated 😉

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Anthony Feig's avatar

Hey man, there's a whole category of "sometimes foods."

I would say this is not so much "falling off the wagon" as it is "negotiating your relationship with 'sometimes foods' going forward." All this to say, don't be too hard on yourself.

I gave up crisps last year (we make them too toxic over here) and I don't miss them, but I still have a sweet tooth and I like a beer a couple times a week. The key is "a couple times a week" and not "several times a day."

Also: YOU ARE NOT SMOKING and that is a huge important thing that you should congratulate yourself for at least 2x per day.

Just for some perspective, you are in better shape and have a better diet than 87% of all Americans; I'm doing better than at least 72% of us.

I know you know all these things, just sending you some support, brother!

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Mark Stevenson's avatar

"Sometimes foods", noted there young man!

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Belinda M Clarke's avatar

I am totally with you on this. I’m currently rolling around in the dirt having fallen off the wagon 🫣 4th day in a row for ice cream 🍦😧 this is my weakness and it’s so hot (my justification). Thank you Mark, this is just the kick up the bum I needed 🙏

P.S I loved the Broccoli post, so much so I subscribed to receive Broccoli through the post 🤩 x

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Mark Stevenson's avatar

This made me smile this morning and a lot less lonely whilst in the 'dirt'😆 You go on the ice cream in this heat, I am sure there are no calories in ice cream anyway when it is this hot.

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Richard O maye's avatar

I know exactly what you are going through. My go to for understanding my human side is reading the book Roman's Chapter 7.

Richard

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Dr Rachel Molloy's avatar

Of course it’s important to be healthy when you can, but a bit of what you fancy now and then is also good for your morale. I guess the trick ( as if it’s easy ) is not letting the treats become a habit - more enjoyable if infrequent anyway - and just getting back on that wagon as soon as you can. So yes, avoid the sugar and ultraprocessed stuff, but if on occasion you really fancy something - and you’ve been through a lot - well maybe you should ditch the guilt and blooming enjoy it. I do think it’s easier to stick to healthy habits if you’re not too rigid with them, don’t put the ‘ naughty stuff ‘ on a pedestal - and be kind to yourself! Sounds to me like you’re doing an awesome job.

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Mark Stevenson's avatar

Thank you Rachel...that what I need to reminded myself....don't let treats become a habit.

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David Monk's avatar

I sympathise it does seem like an uphill struggle just to stay on the level. Also being descended as you say from the great apes,

looks like you may also need to recognise and manage your ‘inner chimp’ if the toothpaste bothers you! Have a look at The Chimp Paradox by Steve Peters, great book. 😁

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Mark Stevenson's avatar

Going for a look now...I am getting better at the toothpaste 'quirk', find that I just squeeze the bottom now even harder to push as much as I can up to the top 😆

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Alastair Walker's avatar

Or “inner child” 🤔😝

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Victoria's avatar

Geez, your inner critic's loud right now. That's a lot of control, expectations, judgment and tight habit watching, Mark! Yes, we're perfectly imperfect human beings. I hear a lot about diet and fitness here, but not so much on 'how' you process to 'calm' and what tools you try to use to rebalance your mental well-being.

Please don't go into a habit tracker mode and berate yourself for not ticking boxes! From my point of view you and Louise are bravely ditching the treadmill life of productivity.

Perhaps this is part of that change. Shifting from routines to humanely balancing what your body needs?!? AND you're right in the middle of the process of the transition, having moved home - I didn't see that mentioned!

I'm sure your therapist can offer more insightful thoughts on that than I can.

You've accomplished so much in a short time - the house sell, the mobile home! You're not just changing your diet and keeping a fitness routine! can I offer that you guys have done more in a few months than most people do in a year! So some self-compassion and figuring out how to process to calm is important...I think I remember you saying you weren't comfortable with mindfulness?!? perhaps you've not discovered a course/support that feels right ...yet?

Hope something there resonates, feel free to ignore if not! Wishing you both well.

P.S You may want to get an Amazon 'Save and subscribe' or backup tube of toothpaste ;-)

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Mark Stevenson's avatar

Thank you Victoria...wise words! Good advice on the toothpaste 😆

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Lee Williams's avatar

Great post. Thank you for your honesty & authenticity Mark.

Fall off wagon, get back on wagon, notice what happened, and maybe why, and repeat.

I guess the trick is in the noticing ( or so my Mindfulness app tells me ) and beginning again.

A huge part of this of course is how saturated life is with stuff that’s bad for you …… what is that all about !!!!!!!

Anyway, we’ve had some extraordinary weather this year, so far, in the UK, so I’d say that you should completely forgive yourself for the Ice Creams ( make hay whilst the sun shines and all that ! )

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Mark Stevenson's avatar

I am going to be honest, the ice creams were so worth it!

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Lee Williams's avatar

Yep, I’d say Ice Cream ( the good stuff, not the Mr Whippy imho ) is definitely worth it !

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Kez's avatar

I can understand what you are saying.

I’m feeling similar. Was hoping for a break from chemo & immuno but I gather last weeks scans show otherwise as I’m booked in for more of it today. I’ve also been taking re-purposed drugs for cancer, changed my diet & at the moment I’m thinking ‘for what,’. Obviously it’s not working….and now I feel like I’m in a black hole.

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Kez's avatar

Thanks Lea

To my surprise, I received really great news about my scans today!

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Mark Stevenson's avatar

Fantastic news!

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Lee Williams's avatar

Keep going Kez.

The only way out is through.

This too shall pass.

Just keep going.

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Hans Casteels's avatar

Why oh why do I know exactly what you’re writing about???

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Mark Stevenson's avatar

Lol...I am glad I am not the only one out there!

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Henry Andrews's avatar

Great blog! So much better than the broccoli one, that nearly made me unsubscribe 😮 Allow these cycles of motivation or whatever to come and go. The mindfulness aim is to notice without judging or wishing to change. Do that, including about the tendency to end up beating yourself up. Go gently, Henry

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Mark Stevenson's avatar

Lol...not a fan of the broccoli one then Henry? 😉...I have moved into being gentle on myself now (and I need to, Louise and I are going out to our favourite Italian restaurant tonight for our Anniversary 🫶)

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Henry Andrews's avatar

That’s good to hear, Mark. Thank you. Happy anniversary!

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